Having a clit vibrator on hand can heighten arousal, inspire curiosity, and encourage exploration with a partner. As long as it’s used safely, a clit vibrator can also boost sexual pleasure, orgasms, and satisfaction during intercourse.
Before you start using your new pleasure tool, however, it’s important to understand how to use it. Follow these simple tips to get the most out of your clit toy.
Set the Scene
Whether you’re using a clit vibrator for pleasure alone or with your partner, it’s important to ease into the experience. “As with anything, it’s always best to start out slow and work your way up to more intense settings,” Stewart says. She also recommends incorporating a barrier such as a towel or underwear to lighten the intensity if it’s too much at first.
Taking your time will also help you figure out where and how you want to use the vibrator. “Some people prefer direct pressure on the clit and others enjoy vibration that spreads across the vulva,” Shannon tells SELF. You’ll also want to decide if you like the feeling of a hard surface (like the ones offered by bullet and clit suction vibrators) or soft, flexible surfaces that feel more gentle and sensual.
And don’t forget to keep your sex toy clean, especially when you’re sharing it with your partner. Per Planned Parenthood, washing your toy with mild soap and warm water is the best method for preventing infection and STI transmission.
Get in the Mood
It’s important to get in the right mood before you use a vibrator for orgasm. If you’re stressed out or preoccupied with work or something else, it’ll be hard to relax and enjoy the sensations.
It also helps to be sexy (either alone or with your partner) and to have a clean space that’s free from distractions. Vibrators are powerful and often cause numbness, so it’s best to start on a lower setting or use a barrier like a towel or underwear. Adding sexy ambiance and a little extra lube can really enhance your experience, too.
If you’re using a clit vibrator (also known as a clitoral stimulator or clit sucker), it’s easiest to insert it into your vagina with the longer end first for external stimulation. Move it around your body, adjusting the pressure and angle, and add lube if you like. You can also try putting it up against your vulva or clitoral hood for internal stimulation. Some sex toys even come with attachments for a more intimate experience, and they can increase the intensity of your orgasm.
Turn It On
There are so many options when it comes to vibrators, and figuring out how to use them can be intimidating — especially for first-timers. Luckily, sex experts have some tips for beginners to make the experience as comfortable and pleasurable as possible.
For starters, experts recommend getting a toy that’s suitable for your comfort level. If you’re a complete newbie, try a bullet vibe (or even a magic wand vibrator) for clitoral stimulation — they’re discreet and easy to maneuver.
Then move on to other types of vibes and experiment with different patterns and speeds. “Ever-changing sensations are what evoke orgasms, so it’s about finding what feels good and how you can use it,” says Fleming.
If you’re a bit more experienced, you can also try using your clit vibrator for penetration. Start by putting on some water-based lube and slowly inserting the vibe, working your way up to the clitoris as you become more comfortable. Some people love direct clit stimulation, but it can be too much for others. If that’s the case, try edging — which is the practice of getting close to orgasm and then backing off.
Apply the Lube
Lube takes the sensation of a clit vibrator to the next level, and can help reduce friction between the toy and your body. It can also make masturbation sexier, and add to the feeling of arousal when used with a partner. If you’re using a silicone toy, choose a water-based lube to avoid degrading the material.
If you’re playing solo with a clit vibrator, try covering the flat end of the vibe in lube and then gently tracing it around your erogenous zones. This can stimulate the labia and glans, as well as your clitoris, and can lead to orgasm.
You can also use a clit vibrator to play with your other erogenous areas, such as the neck, armpits, inner thigh, and feet. Just be sure to choose a non-porous material, like medical-grade silicone, borosilicate glass, or stainless steel, to avoid bacteria buildup and possible infections, as advised by Planned Parenthood.
Explore
The beauty of a clit vibrator is that it offers you the chance to explore your clitoris in ways you might not have before. Whether you’re using the toy solo, for kinky foreplay or to finish with your partner, it’s a great way to get comfortable in the area and to experience pleasure in new ways.
Figure out what type of clitoral stimulation feels good for you (some like direct pressure that hits the head of their clit, while others prefer more of an air-pulsing sensation that covers the entire vulva). You can also try a dual vibe that stimulates your clit and G-spot at once or one that has a clit suction arm for even more options (like a toy that mimics the feeling of cunnilingus).
Just be sure that whatever you choose, it’s made with non-porous material. As Planned Parenthood explains, porous materials can collect bacteria and cause infection. And make sure you clean your toy before and after each use (as well as store it properly to protect against lint and dust). Korin Miller is a writer who covers health, wellness and lifestyle trends for publications including Teen Vogue, Self, Glamour and more.
