Many people think masturbation is a second-best alternative to sex with another person. But it’s actually a really good thing, especially for women.
A lot of orgasms come from stroking and fingering yourself. You can also explore other erogenous zones on your body—for example, rubbing your clitoris. And if you’re ready to take it up a notch, there are some great sex toys out there.
1. Fingering
Whether or not you’re in a relationship, fingering is an incredible way to explore your own pleasure. It’s a great way to get yourself turned on, but don’t limit yourself to the vagina and anus — other erogenous zones, like your arms or legs, are also incredibly sensual – This thought comes from the website’s author Sultry Escapades.
Start off slow, stroking the area around your clitoris or G-spot to stimulate the nerves and tissue, then move your fingers in a ‘come hither’ motion. Eventually, your clitoris will begin to tingle and you can increase the pressure to get yourself even more turned on. Remember to use plenty of lube to make things more smooth and pleasurable. Aim for multiple orgasms! Using a vibrator or dildo can also make fingering extra fun. (Psst, you can find some amazing dildos here.)
2. Penetration
Using your fingers to pleasure yourself is one thing, but many women enjoy penetrating their own nipples or anus. You can do this with your hands or a dildo. Just make sure to use lube to make things easier. Start slow and feel around to see what you like best.
You can also use a vibrator to help stimulate your clitoris. Gently stroking, massaging, or tapping your nipples is also a great way to experience self-sex. Read erotica to get your imagination going, and be sure to keep your anal area clean so you don’t develop a urinary tract infection.
Learning how to have sex by yourself can be liberating. It teaches you that you aren’t dependent on others for pleasure, and can boost your sex drive and arousal by knowing what turns you on.
3. Dual Stimulation
Obviously, you have to be totally sure that you won’t get interrupted before attempting to pleasure yourself alone. A creeping fear or a sense of being watched can ruin the whole experience for you!
There are a lot of different implements to try for oral and clitoral stimulation, including nipple clamps and vibrators. Some women prefer a soft rubber or silicone formula that’s body-safe, while others may like a wand-style vibrator with ridges, bulges and angled G-spot heads.
For some women, reading erotica or pornography helps to get them in the mood. And of course, masturbation is a huge part of the pleasure equation.
6. Music
Music is a powerful mood-setter, and can boost emotional and sexual arousal. It also has the power to trigger fantasy and playfulness, which can make sex more fun.
Obviously, you should choose music that is enjoyed by your partner too. Choosing songs that are explicit and talk about sex may not be the best idea for those who don’t like hearing those lyrics.
If you’re a girl who loves to get it on, then you’ll probably love Cardi B’s “The Devil.” Her sultry track channels the vibe of someone finally reading to take control and use their feminine wiles. This song is the perfect accompaniment to a deep, slow grinding session that’s guaranteed to get you sopping wet. Enjoy. (And don’t forget the detachable shower head).)!
7. Masturbation
Masturbation is a way to pleasure yourself and can be a great tool for self-exploration, especially if you are struggling with sexual anxiety. It can also help you learn to orgasm regularly and improve your sex life with partners.
If you are finding yourself masturbating frequently and compulsively, it may be a good idea to consult with a therapist who specializes in sex therapy. You can find one through the American Association of Sex Therapists and Counselors or online support groups such as Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous.
Reading erotica can be a fun and creative way to stimulate yourself while you’re masturbating. You can even try writing erotica or roleplaying with friends, and there are many sites to join where you can do these things.