The truth is, sex is different for everyone. What matters most is that it’s safe, consensual, and feels good.
Vulva-to-vulva sex—called tribbing or missionary sex—is one popular way lesbians please each other. But there are lots of harmful myths about vulva-to-vulva sex, especially around STIs. It’s important to unlearn these myths and remember that all sexual activity carries risks, so use protection!
Vaginal
Women have a vagina which is the passage between their bladder (which holds our pee) and their vulva – which contains their external reproductive organs. A lot of sexual pleasure happens in the vagina – but it’s not just about penetration. The movement of your partner’s penis inside can feel great too, and gentle stimulation of the clitoris can lead to orgasm. It’s also possible for fluid to squirt out of the vulva before or during an orgasm. This is called female ejaculation and it’s nothing to be embarrassed about.
There are many ways to explore the pleasures of the vagina and different people have varying preferences. It’s important to talk with your partner and keep asking them how they’re feeling so that everyone is happy. If your partner feels uncomfortable with any part of sex, that’s okay too – just let them know so they can pause or stop.
It’s important to use protection when having sexual intercourse because you can get an STD if the penis touches your anus or vulva and there’s no barrier between you. An external condom (sometimes called a male condom) can be used by either woman and should be put on before the penis starts touching or going into the vagina. You can also try a dental dam or a cut-open condom.
Oral
Oral sex is the stimulation of the anus, clitoris and/or penis by mouth or tongue. It can be extremely arousing, and is one of the most direct ways to orgasm for many women. It is also a good way to prepare for penetration and can help build intimacy between partners.
It is important to communicate clearly before, during and after oral sex so both partners know what they are getting into. It is also important to use protection, just as with any other type of sex. Using a condom during cunnilingus and fellatio will protect against sexually transmitted infections (STIs).
If you are unsure what to do, start by talking about it with your partner and trying foreplay. It may take some time to figure out what works best for you, so it is important to be patient and respectful. Try giving her a massage of her inner thighs and the area around her anus before you move on to oral sex. This can be arousing and will allow her to relax before going down on you.
You can also try having her stand with her legs together and then spread them wide. This is a power position for her and can make her feel powerful, which will increase the arousal. You can also use a lubricant such as spit or a flavored lube. Just be aware that spit is drying and may not work as well as a long-lasting store-bought lubricant.
Anal
Anal sex happens when either a penis or a sex toy enters the anus, or when a woman stimulates her own anus with her hands. It’s a bit trickier than penis-in-vagina sex, and it takes a lot of practice to learn to do. Using a lubricant helps reduce friction and may make the experience more pleasurable for both partners.
Women who have anal sex often say they do it to feel closer to their partner, to please themself or in exchange for sexual favors (called quid pro quo). In addition, some women find that anal sex feels more natural than vaginal sex.
Having anal sex can also cause painful hemorrhoids, a group of swollen blood vessels near the anus. To prevent this, it’s important to use a water-based lubricant and to always be clean. It’s also a good idea to relax before anal sex so that the sphincter relaxes and penetration is comfortable.
As with all sex, it’s important to communicate clearly and ask for what you want. You should also know your partners HIV and STI status, especially if you’re at high risk for infection. Talk to your doctor about getting tested and taking a daily pill called pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP) to lower your chances of becoming infected with HIV. You should also use condoms to protect against other STIs.
Masturbation
Masturbation is a normal part of sexual development for women and men. It has many physical and mental health benefits, including reducing stress and depression and improving sleep. It also promotes intimacy and helps you understand your own body, feelings, and desires. In addition, it can help you prevent unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections. However, if masturbation becomes an addiction, it may be necessary to seek professional help. A sex therapist can help you identify your triggers and develop healthy coping skills.
The clitoris is a sensitive organ located in the female reproductive system. It has thousands of nerve endings, and stimulating it can cause pleasure and excitement. Masturbation increases blood flow to the clitoris, which stimulates the area and feels good. It also releases mood-enhancing hormones, such as dopamine and epinephrine.
There used to be a lot of shame and secrecy around female masturbation, but that has changed. Today, lesbians and biwomen have a much more open attitude toward female sexuality. They can masturbate with a partner or on their own. They can have oral or vaginal sex, frottage, and mutual masturbation sex. They can use toys, dildos, and leather harnesses. And they can even wear blindfolds. In fact, some lesbians have a fetish for stroking their partners’ dicks with a leather strap-on.
